Letter One!

Hi Miss Jain,

its a Sunday today so despite being in the final year in MBBS i feel i can take a day off and reflect on the week. i intend to make this a habit, so that i can pen down my reflections for future references and maybe use them as a weapon when we fight next :p

   please don't mind the syntax as I'm not really used to typing on the keyboard.

So, the week began with you leaving for your college. And I must thank you for ensuring that I'm mentally prepared to take the insults of the hectic routine before you left. i try to do the same but evidently I haven't been doing a good job.

it is exciting to be so serious about my profession for  once in these four years. I'm putting in more hours and straining my muscles a little more in the process, but it all seems worth it. I don't know about my fellow friends but i can bet that life gets really easy when you have one more reason to excel at something. i feel lucky to have you and i feel that after every set of 100 words that i read from the textbooks or after every monotonous class that i sweat in. 

   waking up in the morning used to be a real challenge for me. i'd even go to the extent of saying that i would've been the ambassador of the college if i had found you earlier. looking at myself in the mirror after every running session in the morning i feel I'm giving my bit to this relationship. i can't picture how else could someone start with so much of energy after spending so much time in the same place having the same food and not to forget, being fraught with addictions. So Miss Jain, when I say that you're my reason to be,  you better believe me. 

   I wish I could be the same for you. Not that we've been under-performing because of the same reasons, but whatever it is that's keeping you from living the dream life, i wish i could be that extra reason for you to be the person you started out to be. 

from what I've realized, you're trapped among a bunch of people who don't share your passion for the profession even a little. and then there are the usual distractions...the solitude, the monotony, the condescension, and the mean professors. 

if you think that i have my ways to deal with these problems, or that i don't face such problems, then I'm afraid Miss Jain! you're wrong. the only difference between me and you is that I've been using you as a reason to fight my old-self, whereas in your case, you've already taken that environment around you to be your reality. well Miss Jain! you can be right in all the arguments that we'll have in the future but you're wrong about this one again. That's NOT YOUR REALITY. 

 Mr Suresh Jain didn't hide you in his shirt to save you from the cold for this. I'm not saying this just because you're my girlfriend. you very well know that i have had nothing but respect for you and your values even before we met. 

I'm gonna be with you in every step of the way. just like your dad has been so far and just like you'd want your boyfriend to be. but it'd be a lot better if we could use this relationship to build each other instead of following the age-old sacrosanct superfluous fake notion about relationships that people around us do. 

its a new day of a new week tomorrow. i'm still motivated to see that look in your eyes when i see you next. the look that just can't be put into words. i'm sure that given the state of mind you're in right now, this post won't make a lot of sense to you. but read it again and again through the week and lemme know if i'm getting close to being the boyfriend that i started out to be, or moving further away from it.

                                                                                        -always a fan 

                                                                                           Mr. Sharma.